Finding Mr./Mrs. Right

I thought that all of the texts from this week at least touched on the issue of power and control based on gender.  Stereotypes about men and women (especially men and women in relationships) were also prominent in this week’s readings. 

“It’s Not About the Nail” was a comical, satirical video about women’s needs in a relationship.  Although I did not relate to the woman in the video, I think that there is some truth to the video’s message.  I have definitely met women who really love to talk about their problems, but who aren’t really looking for a solution because they would rather complain about it.  These women drive me crazy.  While I did find the video funny, I also believe that this is an unfair stereotype about women.  For the most part, I do not think that females enjoy complaining and being miserable more than being happy and without any complaints.  I also noticed that the woman in this video seemed to have the majority of the power in the relationship.  She basically manipulated her boyfriend into sympathizing, or pretending to sympathize with her unsympathetic whining.  “Women and Marriage at Princeton” also talked about the power dynamic between men and women.  The letter from the Princeton alumna suggested that women who attend an elite college should not lower their standards and marry a man with less than the same level of education that they have.  Susan Patton basically told Princeton women that they are better than most of the men, and that they have the power and the right to find a husband at their college.  I thought that Patton’s letter was both offensive because she basically degraded anybody, man or woman, who did not attend Princeton or another Ivy League college.  However, the facts at the end of the article about the trade-offs that men and women make imply that both genders have ‘power’ to be selective when choosing a partner.  Similarly, the video about the horrible dating profile attests to the facts in the previous article.  The men were willing to ignore the woman’s horrible traits and education because she was attractive.  Again, the idea of women as powerful comes into play here.  However, in this example, the power that the woman has is due to her physical appearance.  Her body was what had the power to draw in the men. 

Trifles takes place in an older, different time, but the story deals with stereotypes about women and men.  In the story, Mrs. Peters and Mrs. Hale sympathize with Mrs. Wright, the convicted murderer because they feel that she was stuck in a bad marriage.  The men in the play dismiss the women and their “trifles” because they find them petty.  The men do not seem to care about the circumstances of the Wrights’ marriage; their primary concern is proving that Minnie is guilty.  Again, this play shows the stereotypes that men make about the things that women consider important.  “Hanging Fire” describes the sadness of a fourteen-year-old African American girl who has to deal with an absent mother.  Based on what the girl says about her mother being “in the bedroom with the door closed,” I assumed that the mother was probably either sleeping with men for money or spending more time with a boyfriend than she spent paying attention to her daughter.  This may be a criticism (or it may be a stretch to say this) about how men have the ability to make certain women feel important.  I thought that this poem criticized lower-income, African American women specifically.  It played into the stereotype that they have to sleep with men for either attention or money, neglecting their children.  Lastly, the NCJRS page about criminal women informs the reader that many female felons come from very rough pasts.  Many women are abused and actually victims themselves.  Although there is not really an excuse for serious crimes, this website shows how men, parents, and other people can be a major cause of women’s criminal activity.  Trifles, “Hanging Fire,” and the NCJRS site all can be interpreted as revealing the kind of power that men have over women, whereas “It’s Not About the Nail,” “Women and Marriage at Princeton,” and “Woman Creates Monstrous Dating Profile” seem to be more about the control that women have over men.